Does anyone else hate small talk




















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Successfully Subscribed! So we often find ourselves bringing these torturous conversations upon ourselves. We spot that one awkward person at the party and feel this need to make that person feel included. We walk up and ask that person how his or her day is going.

And, no matter how miserable he or she seems to be, we continue to try our hardest to make this person feel comfortable. You know the situation I'm talking about. The two of you aren't clicking, but you feel like you have to force the conversation so that you don't make the other person uncomfortable. I have no idea what you're thinking, ever. Especially before I've never said more than 20 words to you. But small talk forces me to somehow transform into some sort of mind reader.

I need to understand what you will find interesting so that I can talk about that. I need to laugh at what you're saying even if I don't find it funny. But how we get to know each other when we're being fake, awkward versions of ourselves? That's all it comes down to, really. As an example, I have absolutely no interest in watching reality TV. I am endlessly fascinated by what people get out of watching it, however.

I use small talk as an opportunity to indulge my curiosity about this topic. If someone starts talking about a recent episode, I will usually say something along the lines of. What makes it such compelling viewing? A really good way to show that we are interested in a deeper conversation is to give out a little information about ourselves. I like to think of it as similar to offering someone a drink when they come into your house. During conversations about the weather, for example, I will often mention that I love gardening.

If we are talking about how bad the traffic is, I might drop in a comment about how I miss riding a motorbike. These are conversational offerings. Avoid pausing the conversation to try to remember exact details, such as names or dates.

I regularly forget names, so I often say. Oh, I forget their name. This keeps the conversation moving and shows that I am prioritizing things that the other person might find at least slightly interesting. Also, avoid trying to force the conversation onto other, more interesting, topics. Being polite and changing the subject naturally helps to build that trust. Even if you find the conversation boring, try to avoid showing this.

That can leave them feeling uncomfortable and encourage them to end the conversation before you have a chance to reach more interesting topics. For example, if someone starts talking to me about the weather on a rainy day, I might say. Including at least one positive statement can help you come across as a generally positive person. I have a confession to make. I know nothing at all about actors, most musicians, or football. When someone starts to make small talk about those topics, it would obvious pretty quickly if I pretended to know.

Instead, I ask questions. Was it a good one? This includes asking questions, offering your opinion, or finding new topics. How about you? Try to remember that a conversation is a team sport.

Carrying your fair share of the conversation allows you to gently steer the conversation towards topics that you find more interesting and away from things you find most boring. What to do you prefer; Apple or Samsung?

Do you prefer large open networking or small groups? It may also start to give you clues about them introvert, extrovert? For more ideas about networking and how this could help, click here. Who knows more of your dream clients than anybody else? Another good networking question, making them think, allowing you to offer help if you can and allowing them to easily ask the same question.

Your smartphone is a great tool. It can give you an excuse when the conversation runs dry! Use the chat-box to target individuals and have mini one to one conversation. The aim is a bit of business and a little personal chat, so you understand their business and know them a little. One thing that can make it easier is your personal brand. What in your personal brand makes it easier for them to ask you questions? Did you know I love scuba diving? You may also like to read : How can I get beyond small talk Why introverts don't like small talk and how to be better at it Should you arrive early to networking events?

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